My dad, for all of his faults, was an excellent driving instructor. In fact that is probably one of the only situations I can think of where he always kept his cool. It didn’t matter if I made a minor mistake or scared the shit out of him. He would very calmly tell me what I did wrong and that it was ok to make mistakes.

When I taught my oldest to drive, I approached it the same way. She is a pretty anxious person in general and is absolutely terrified of driving. But, she is actually a very safe and competent driver. It took her 8 attempts (that is not a misprint) to pass the written permit test so don’t feel too bad about that.

I think the keys (no pun intended) to being a good driver are:

• Driving defensively. Trust no one. There are a ton of idiots out there who think they alone have the right to use the road. Let 'em pass. It’s better to be alive than to die defending your right of way. Assume no one else can see you and be captain obvious about everything you do. Trust no one.

• Recognizing that driving is like 90% done by feel. You need to be comfortable in the driver’s seat. By “comfortable” I mean all the important stuff is easily within reach and you have good visibility without having to move around a lot. If this is a problem due to your height then a different, probably smaller, vehicle is in order.

• Look where you want to go. A mistake beginners often make is looking at the road right in front of them when they should be looking quite a ways up the road. It sounds counter intuitive but your brain is remarkably good at using peripheral vision to keep you on course. This will make your driving much smoother and keep you from weaving back and forth.

• Practice, practice, practice. You will get better at it but you’re going to have to practice. Find some place where there isn’t a lot of traffic at first. Drive at your level of experience. Don’t try to tackle 10 lane highways if you don’t think you’re ready for it.

• Panic internally. React externally. Remember I said 90% of driving is done by feel? Knowing how to calmly respond to certain situations and practicing so those responses become automatic habits may save your life. Example: I live in a very hilly area where it snows a whole twice a year but I grew up where it snows a lot so I’m familiar with how to drive on it. Every time we get snow, the ditch going into town will be lined with cars of people who hit a slick spot, panicked, smashed the brakes, and went flying off the road. If I hit a slick spot and start sliding, I’m still going to panic a little. What I’m NOT going to do is touch the brake pedal. I’m going to take my foot off the gas and counter steer to bring the vehicle back under control. I don’t even think about it. It’s just sort of an automatic reflex. And it’s a reflex because I’ve been practicing that maneuver for 20 years.

You can do this. If my 17 year old, who is afraid of absolutely everything, can be a good driver, you can be a good driver. I believe in you. When you mess up, and you will, don’t beat yourself up. Just imagine old J.T. Cornpone from Lemmy is sitting there right next to you and telling you, “It’s alright but let’s try not to do that next time.”