SourDragon

“NOM!” - the leopards, in regards to faces

Who tf blocks coolmathgames? And, more importantly, why‽‽‽

We lost another queen to hate crimes 😔

That never occurred to me, but if they wanna keep us safe when we’re pooping then perhaps they think we’re doing the same watching them

That is a beautiful analogy

Now I wanna see him cameo as someone on ERB

My spouse and I have started to only close the bathroom door when we have guests. We usually leave it cracked open so our cats can come in and make sure we’re safe, which is what they’re doing.

They are worried about you because bathroom time is one of a cat’s most vulnerable moments, so they assume it’s the same for us and they’re just trying to keep us safe

They also didn’t mention bike lanes, so it’s probably safe to assume they either (a) don’t exist where they live or (b) there are bike lanes but the cyclists are assholes who refuse to use them

“I thank you, my princess” curtsies respectfully

That still gets a chuckle out of me 😂

Oddly enough, idk if this is about actual football or american handegg, but both seem true in a sense.

got a new phone and autocorrect is NOT used to my typing patterns

Oof I feel that. My phone is about a week old and it’s frustrating

Sorry for this being unrelated to the content at hand, but that edit hit me

I got distracted by the wrong thing…

As an autistic stoner, I can confirm this is completely true

As an American, at this point I’d accept every country’s shittiest people if it means we can give you refugees trying to escape this hellhole.

Reminds me of a two sentence horror I read a few years back:

“I wish there was a cure for cancer!”

“Why waste your wish on something that already exists?”

Fuck

[insert joke about getting a virus or something]

So if I want to start an argument with my spouse, I play a C Major?

The marx bros are so funny 😆